Day 3: Become a Trusted Leader By Showing Your Sharing Skills
Today you’re going to be continuing on with your mantra of being a giver in your niche by doing something for your followers that most marketers won’t do.
Most marketers share only their opinion, their knowledge, and their website links. They would never dare let their readers know that they actually go out and learn from other experts, much less share that outside expertise with a backlink to someone else’s site.
Many marketers see the journey of becoming a leader in their niche as stepping all over the competition. Just think how many “competition CRUSHER” courses there are and how we’re taught to DOMINATE over everyone else.
To be a giver and sharer seems pretty weak in their eyes! You’re supposed to MILK your customers, not cater to their needs. You’re only supposed to link out to people you have a JV in place with, not just any expert – especially those who might know more than you do!
Right?
Wrong! That’s what I like to call sleaze marketing. It’s selfish. They’re not in it to help their followers – they’re just in it to hog the attention of the target audience and squeeze money from their wallets.
That’s not you! You’re genuinely in this because you want to help people – whether it’s with their diet, their skin problems, their emotional well-being, or their finances.
My Personal “Real Life” Example of a Sharer
I am THE most persnickety person when it comes to choosing a doctor. My kids still see the man who was MY pediatrician as a child. Why? Because he’s a giver and he’s not afraid to showcase differing opinions.
Let me give you an example of this:
There was a time when the chickenpox vaccine was highly encouraged. Then suddenly, it wasn’t recommended. Then later, it was highly encouraged again.
I am a worrywart, so I was nervous about all the back and forth research. I didn’t know what information was relevant or whose opinion to trust.
My doctor never once gave JUST his opinion on this debate. He sat down and talked to me about it, citing research AND giving me opposing viewpoints on the discussion so that I could make up my own mind.
Ultimately, I relied on his advice because:
a.) I knew he was out there “knowing his stuff” so to speak. He clearly showed he had researched this topic, and knew all of the up-to-date information. I always wonder how many doctors stop their quest for learning – not mine!
b.) He wasn’t intimidated to share opposing viewpoints. This made me trust his opinion because he clearly discussed those options and backed it up with why he didn’t feel the same. He wasn’t “hiding” anything from me, in other words.
c.) He even wrote down the name of independent studies I could go online and read more about.
WOW! In other words, he wasn’t arrogant enough to think that only his $0.02 mattered to me.
I appreciated that! And I love it when I go online searching for information, too.
Other Reasons Why This Method of Sharing Is Popular
By popular, I don’t mean popular with marketers – I mean popular with your audience.
They love it because, in addition to those three reasons I mentioned before, it:
a.) Makes your blog a one-stop-shop. If they KNOW that you took the time to scour the ‘net and do the research for them, they will be SO grateful. I know this for a fact because I see complaints by newcomers to marketing who get overwhelmed when people tell them to go “Google” a topic to understand it.
Many people have no idea how to search for real information. They might Google a word and get frustrated when they find thin affiliate sites or ad sites or eBook sites. They want someone to guide them, to help them navigate through the thousands or millions of search results Google provides – not hard sell them or corner them into only knowing one viewpoint.
b.) They trust you to get the best information out there and to be fair. Having a slant or opinion doesn’t mean you have to slam the door on opposing opinions.
When your readers truly trust you, they know you’ll give a fair and balanced viewpoint of the topic at hand. You can say one side is wrong over another, but they’ll trust you to back it up with reasons why.
Sharing Information on Both Sides of the Coin
This is the task I want you to do for your readers today. You’re going to do the following (don’t do it yet!):
1. Come up with a statement or question for your niche where you debate it on a single blog post. Pick a side and back up your reasons for doing so.
2. Explain what the debate is and why it’s important.
3. Give both sides of the argument.
4. Provide multiple OUTSIDE references to both sides in a variety of media formats.
5. Explain what happens if the advice you offer is ignored.
6. Talk about how they can make the changes you suggest.
Now before you go doing this on your own, read on – I have some helpful information that can make sharing a positive experience for both you AND your audience!
The Different Learning Styles of Your Readers
The first thing you need to know is that not everyone absorbs information the same way. And I’m not just talking about the fact that some people prefer video to text or vice versa.
What I’m talking about is the way your audience comes to your virtual classroom ready to learn – what questions they need to be addressed right off the bat, or what expectations they want you to meet for complete satisfaction.
I’ve been reading a lot on how to be a guide for others in a niche. One book my own mentor sent me a long time ago which I only recently cracked open was called Hold On, You Lost Me!
It taught me how to connect to people based on various learning styles. Here’s some of what I gleaned that’s relevant to this exercise:
a.) Some people come to you wondering why.
There will be those who land on your blog who want to know why this information is important. Why is it relevant to their lives? Why is it valuable to know?
So it’s not enough to just give a statement and tell your opinion. You have to explain why it is they need to know this – don’t expect them to “get it” because there will be some who won’t see its relevance.
You’re not only going to explain why it’s important based on your opinion but why it’s vital for them to know based on other people’s insights.
b.) Some people come to you wondering what.
What is this blog post teaching them? What data is there to back up your statement – facts, please!? What do other people (experts) think about this?
c.) Some people come to you wondering how.
How will this specifically better their lives? How can they implement your advice into their day? How can they overcome any obstacles they run into?
d.) Some people come to you wondering if.
Oh boy, this is me. I’m a big “if” person. Primarily, it stems from laziness. When someone’s teaching me something new, I always want to know IF I’ll really be missing out if I ignore the advice.
I also want to know what could happen IF I mess up the advice, or IF I do implement it, IF it will improve my life.
I like to get evidence of IF this information is true or false. I like to know what will happen IF I FrankenTiff the information (alter it to fit me). I like to know IF there’s more information out there for me to form my opinion on.
All of these are obstacles that consumers bring to the table to force you to overcome in an effort to reach them on an emotional and logical level. If you provide information in all of these styles, you reach a wider target audience.
I’m going to show you how to create the perfect debate blog post where you teach in a variety of methods and media to strengthen your message and position you as the highest source of information in your niche.
Now I’m about to show you how to let this type of creation unfold. But I’m going to show you my preferred method of doing it – creating the content and then adding to it after you’re finished.
I do mine kind of like a painting. I create the main framework of the piece, then add details. You can choose to do it differently, detailing as you go if you want to. Everyone’s unique in his or her preferences.
Step 1: Pick Your Debate Topic
I know some of you get nervous when considering a discussion where people might disagree with you. But that’s what gets discussions going, it’s what helps showcase your expertise, and it helps you squash any false information out there!
Almost every niche has a problem. What’s your niche’s problem? I’m going to show a few examples so you can get an idea of how to develop your topic. And I want you to choose a question or statement to title your blog post with that you will prove or disprove!
This is my niche, so let’s start there and we’ll move on to non-marketing niches in a moment. Brainstorm a list of issues people face in your niche. For me, it might look like this:
a. Lack of money
b. Lack of time
c. Don’t know who to trust
d. Don’t understand something
So I will go through and think of a debatable concept for each of these issues. It might look something like this (and these correspond with the above list topics):
a. Newbies Getting Poor Advice on Use of Free Platforms
I see this happening all the time – someone will ask if it’s okay to start off on Squidoo, for example – and some forum participants will warn them away from it, telling them if they don’t have a domain and hosting, don’t even try. I know they’re wrong, so I could debate it.
b. Are You Letting Lack of Time Be Your Excuse for Failure?
This is another thing I see quite often. People complaining they don’t have time to work on their business. I think they’re full of it! I think it’s a combination of fear, procrastination, and perfectionism. I know this because I see many who hold full-time jobs, care for multiple ill people, have zero time for themselves, but STILL manage to spend a few minutes hardcore working on their business.
c. Are You Being Naïve Because You’re Desperate to Make Money?
I sort of already talked about this with my list, but there are so many people who continue making poor buying decisions and taking zero responsibility for their actions, blaming scummy product owners when I’m ready to tell them it’s partly their fault too! This is bound to cause a stir, but I can back up my opinions.
d. You’re Using Confusion as Your Crutch But I Won’t Allow That Anymore!
This suits my tone for my blog – blunt – yours may need to be gentler. This is something I see quite a bit – something that bugs me. So I’m going to deliver a kick in the rear. In fact, I’ll post it on my blog later.
2. Beauty Tips
I saw a few of these in the challenge. Let’s think of a few issues your audience might be dealing with:
a. Don’t know how to apply make-up correctly
b. Can’t afford good makeup
c. Have bad skin
d. Never feel satisfied because they don’t look like models
What’s something debatable you could do about these topics?
a. Are You Still Stuck in the 80s Wearing Cake-Up Instead of Make-Up?
Thanks to the forum trolls who taught me the phrase cake-up! You could discuss how too many women overapply make-up when they should be striving for a fresh look.
b. Quit Crying About the Cost of Make-Up When You Can Get By With Less!
You could teach them how to have a couple of choice pieces, or which brand they could afford that’s good (and why), etc.
c. The Worst Thing You Can Do for Bad Skin Is Try to Conceal It!
Piling on make-up clogs pores doesn’t help you heal, etc. You could talk about how they’re emotional about their bad skin, be empathetic, but then boost their confidence with some tips.
d. Is Your Self Esteem Faltering Because Vogue Is Putting Pressure on You?
Talk about the airbrushing, giving real-life examples of scandals – Julia Roberts is one, for example). Show real and airbrushed versions.
3. Cooking
I saw a lot of cooking niches as well – some for passion (French food) and some for dietary reasons. So let’s choose the healthy cooking niche to use as an example. Problems the reader might have:
a. Healthy food is too expensive
b. Healthy food doesn’t taste good
c. Fat and sugar are bad for you
d. I don’t know how to cook many meals
Now let’s turn those into some debate-style blog posts:
a. Are You a Hypocrite When It Comes to Spending Money on Food?
I would let them know it’s not going to fly complaining that healthy food is too expensive when they’re used to spending money on fast food. Healthy food fills you up longer, and you can have it for leftovers. They’re not making any effort to shop around and find specials or freeze or can foods for later use when they’re bought on sale.
b. Healthy food doesn’t taste good
Only if you keep your meal repertoire to a bare minimum! They should be willing to taste new foods, explore different styles of cooking and seasoning, and they may discover that it’s all you need.
c. Fat and sugar are NOT bad for you
This would be great right now – Denmark just introduced a fat tax – even on avocados – you know, the one with the GOOD fats? But your first reaction to this title is, “Of course they are!”
I would also talk about how the news is stirring debate about diet sodas and sweets, which leave the body wanting more calories – when having moderation could be healthier for you.
d. I don’t know how to cook many meals
What an excuse! You could talk about fast and easy (yet healthy) ways to prepare meals, like broiling meat or using a new kitchen appliance and technique that adds flavor but reduces calories.
What you want to do is make people want to join in on the discussion – for or against you! And you want to evoke an emotional response for them.
You also want to take a stand one way or the other, so they know your viewpoint. Ever heard that saying, “If you stand for nothing, you’ll fall for anything?” I personally like to follow people who have an opinion on something.
You don’t want to be vanilla – you want to be exciting, flavorful – someone who attracts a crowd because they’re INTERESTING!
I’m assuming you know your niche well enough to know what problems they’re needing you to guide them through. If not, you need to go back to square one and learn about your niche!
It’s not as easy as conducting a quick Google search – you need to be in the hearts and minds of your target audience.
Step 2: Explain What the Debate Is and Why It’s Important
Remember those people coming to your blog with different expectations and learning styles. You want to cover all bases, so for those who complain about the length of a blog post, let it go.
Just because YOU like to skim, doesn’t mean others do. And even if they skim, so what? The information is there in case they see text that makes them want to slow down and dig in. Don’t cater to people’s impatience just because you’re worried they’ll click out.
We’re moving into content now. Don’t worry about being a perfectionist. This is “from the heart” information, backed with supporting information.
I’m going to show you an example here that is NON-marketing and actually write my OWN niche example on my blog so you can see both. Let’s use the example from the health niche – Fat and Sugar Are NOT Bad for You.
If I was in this niche, this is how I would address the second step – what and why:
“For a long time now, we’ve been taught all sorts of wrong information about how to eat healthily – most notably that fat and sugar are bad and should be avoided at all costs when you’re trying to lose weight.
I believe that those who teach this method of dieting are absolutely wrong – and once I explain why it might help put your mind at ease and make the implementation of better nutritional choices less of a struggle for you.”
The first paragraph tells the reader what the debate is. The second addresses why they might want to know this information. You’ll add more answers to these questions throughout the blog post.
Step 3: Give Both Sides of the Story
It’s important that you show both sides of a story. That doesn’t mean you support both sides – it means you tell your readers, “Here’s what they’re saying. Here’s what I believe.”
“Some say that fat and sugar are what’s ruining our nation. You have news media coming out to the public every day with new changes in our nutritional advice and suggested restrictions – it’s enough to drive you crazy!
I get it – I understand they’re looking at what ingredients aren’t chock full of vitamins or those which, when eaten in abundance, put your body on overdrive, struggling to burn off calories.
They’re looking at the huge increase in weight-related illnesses, such as diabetes, and looking for someone to point the finger at. It’s putting a strain on our healthcare system and it could be threatening the longevity of mankind if things continue as they’re going.
But my way of thinking is that fat and sugar aren’t our enemies – our mindset is. Those people bashing fat and sugar don’t consider the fact that moderation exists – that it’s perfectly possible for someone to indulge in these ingredients (even on a daily basis) and continue to be healthy and happy.
Being denied foods only make us want them more. We’re raised with threats that if we don’t finish our plates, we don’t get dessert – they’re dangled in front of us like carrots on a stick. We’re told that while dieting, fat and sugar are completely forbidden.”
If this were my niche, I might be even more specific, but I’m just showing you an example for now. Now it’s time to pull in the multi-media resources that prove you’re a researcher and a sharer of good, solid free information, helping people make up their minds!
Step 4: Provide Multiple OUTSIDE References for Both Sides
This is the part you might choose to do as you write your initial blog post. I like to get my thoughts down first, uninterrupted – and then go out and gather specific resources to back up my blog post with – not just MY opinion, but those of the opposing viewpoint, too.
How do you find them? Google! You’re going to search for things by using the left sidebar in Google that lets you choose from blog sources, news, and maybe even images! I might start with the opposing viewpoint like this:
I find Harvard articles, Men’s Health magazine content, Web MD advice, and forum discussions about it. I ignore Yahoo Answers as an expert source. You might also be in a niche where a magazine at the grocery store acts as a perfect resource. Or maybe you see a news report on TV.
So below, I’m going to paste what I have written for this example so far and put the new additions in bold for you so you can see how I did it.
“For a long time now, we’ve been taught all sorts of wrong information about how to eat healthily – most notably that fat and sugar are bad and should be avoided at all costs when you’re trying to lose weight.
Top highly revered experts are shaming people into a situation where they’re told if they eat these foods, they’re addicts – and they now have to go into stringent detox situations.
Look at Oprah’s poster boy for good health, Dr. Mehmet Oz on ABC News calling people who like donuts “addicts:”
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/dr-mehmet-oz-beat-fat-sugar-addiction-detox/story?id=12823912
I believe that those who teach this method of dieting are absolutely wrong – yes, even Dr. Oz, and once I explain why, it might help put your mind at ease and make the implementation of better nutritional choices less of a struggle for you.
Some say that fat and sugar are what’s ruining our nation. You have news media coming out to the public every day with new changes in our nutritional advice and suggested restrictions – it’s enough to drive you crazy!
Take coffee for instance. There’s been so much back and forth dialogue about whether coffee is good or bad for you, it’s like watching a tennis tournament!
On Web MD, they have an article about whether coffee is good or bad for you, confusing consumers even more. First, they tell us all of the good things coffee provides for our bodies – and state research that shows the more you drink, the healthier you are when it comes to diabetes risk!
But then…they hit you with this information:
“Regular coffee, of course, also contains caffeine. Caffeine can raise blood pressure, as well as blood levels of the fight-or-flight chemical epinephrine…”
Okay, so which is it – do I drink it or not? Consumers are left worrying regardless of which decision they choose. And what about fat? Some experts completely ignore the fact that there are indeed GOOD fats!
Luckily some research is clear on this, but only consumers lucky enough to stumble on it get the facts. Harvard School of Public Health tries to guide people in their article, “The Bottom Line: Choose Healthy Fats, Limit Saturated Fat, and Avoid Trans Fat.”
They REALLY put a kink in dieters’ nutritional label reading plans when they say this:
“…dietary cholesterol isn’t nearly the villain it’s been portrayed to be. Cholesterol in the bloodstream is what’s most important. And the biggest influence on blood cholesterol level is the mix of fats in your diet—not the amount of cholesterol you eat from food.”
And all those victims of high cholesterol who pick up packages and see how much cholesterol is in a product feel defeated at the confusing information – once again.
I get it – I understand they’re looking at what ingredients aren’t chock full of vitamins or those which, when eaten in abundance, put your body on overdrive, struggling to burn off calories.
They’re looking at the huge increase in weight-related illnesses, such as diabetes, and looking for someone to point the finger at.
It’s putting a strain on our healthcare system and it could be threatening the longevity of mankind if things continue as they’re going, as shown in this graphic shared by the National Institutes of Health and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
But my way of thinking is that fat and sugar aren’t our enemies – our mindset is. Those people bashing fat and sugar don’t consider the fact that moderation exists – that it’s perfectly possible for someone to indulge in these ingredients (even on a daily basis) and continue to be healthy and happy.
It’s perfectly possible for someone to learn good habits that enable them to add lots of fresh fruit and vegetables and grains into their diets and still indulge in some foods for the sheer sake of enjoyment, as the LiveStrong.com website assures dieters in this passage:
“The guidelines recommend you increase your intake of fruits and vegetables and add more whole-grain products. If you increase your fruit and vegetable intake daily, you’re on the road to improving your health and your weight.
Make whole grains, vegetables, and fruits the foundation of your diet. Then add on the other food groups in smaller portions–proteins, dairy, fats, and sweets. Make moderation a part of your eating–enjoy all foods in moderation.”
See that last part I underlined? It’s important – but dieting fanatics like to either go hardcore and cut out all fats and sugars or not a diet at all. And THAT is where failure and obesity is growing at an alarming rate.
Being denied foods only make us want them more. We’re raised with threats that if we don’t finish our plates, we don’t get dessert – they’re dangled in front of us like carrots on a stick. We’re told that while dieting, fat, and sugar are completely forbidden.
The Huffington Post had a great article by Marcia Reynolds called “10 Steps Toward Making Peace With Food” that really stressed the problem with guilty eating messages coming from the media.
She says, “the diet food industry perpetuates the “good food-bad food = good girl-bad girl” concept through commercials like the one for Fiber One Brownies where a woman finally gets behind the velvet rope and into the forbidden world of something that now tastes great.
Men and women alike have hopped onto a harmful artificial sugar bandwagon because of the shame in indulging in REAL sweets from time to time (and even in moderation). And what’s this doing to their bodies? Harming them!
The reason is, artificial sweeteners do NOT turn on a satiety signal in our bodies that make us feel satisfied and “fed” to be blunt! This was reported by the European Journal of Clinical Nutrition.
CBS News reported in a very straight-to-the-point fashion, “Sorry, soda lovers – even diet drinks can make you fat!”
WOW! Here you’ve been tolerating Diet Coke because a real Coke makes you feel guilty, and now you know why the pounds aren’t coming off like you thought they would.
“Artificial sweeteners could have the effect of triggering appetite but unlike regular sugars, they don’t deliver something that will squelch the appetite,” said Sharon Fowler, an obesity researcher at UT Health Science Center at San Diego.”
Step 5: Explain What Happens if the Advice You Offer Is Ignored
The article is taking shape now. The debate topic is clear. You’ve presented the sides and chosen one to support. And you’ve pulled in a variety of multi-media resources with quotes and references to prove the points and images to break up the text.
By the way, with the Dr. Oz story, I would probably not only include a link but embed the video on my blog, too.
Now it’s time to add a portion that explains what life will be like if they don’t heed your advice. So I might add the following personalized story and then conclude with the “if” scenario.
“I struggled with diet guilt and shame for years, my weight creeping up on me every year at a rate of 10 pounds per year until I finally put the brakes on it.
I grew up with a diet mentality – even women who were thin were always dieting, so it seemed normal to deprive and binge and hide and cry about food.
Once I went to a nutritionist who taught balance and elimination of guilt, I no longer felt the need to stuff myself with sweets (because I knew I’d be “dieting” again shortly).
I grew a mindset that it’s there if I want it, and when I want it, I’ll have it – and oddly enough, I no longer over-indulge. The panic to eat it is gone. My weight has slowly been coming off, effortlessly.
True, it’s not as fast or as much as it would be with a strict fad diet regimen, but I can honestly say I’m happier and healthier than before when I was thinner and fluctuating with my weight on the diet yo-yo train.
This is the nutritionist I saw – Jennifer Pereira – and what I love is the way she legalized food so that I no longer felt like a criminal when it came to eating.
One funny story that happened when I was seeing her for help is the shame I felt one morning having to tell her I ate a piece of cake for breakfast. She threatened to make me have cake every morning until I no longer felt guilty for eating it. I nervously laughed but eventually, the lessons paid off.
If I had continued on with my shame and guilt of eating fats and sugars, I would have continued watching my weight spiral out of control. You might be on the same self-destructive path.
If you give yourself permission, you might see a short-term spike in indulging, but it should level off as you become more comfortable with the idea that there are no bad foods.”
Step 6: Talk About How They Can Make Changes You Suggest
It’s fine to debate a point of view and encourage people to change their way of thinking, but if you don’t give them any insight on exactly how they can do that, they may leave your site confused and let down.
I like to end with some concrete steps they can implement to fix the situation or alter their way of thinking, like this:
“I want you to start practicing moderation and reintroduce the enjoyment of food – not denigrate it and bury yourself in shame about it.
So here are six steps you can take to change your mindset over the course of the next few months – it won’t happen in a day or a week – you have to practice it and live it for it to become a part of you:
1. Stop saying, “No” to foods. It’s very uncomfortable right at first, but if you wake up and want cake, cut a piece of cake. Initially, you’ll feel guilt, but over time, it will go away.
2. Eat foods in any order that you want. Dinner for breakfast, breakfast for dinner – stop putting rules on what foods can be eaten, and when.
3. Make sure you watch your hunger levels. Right at first, you may eat faster because you’re indulging in something formerly forbidden. But as that guilt subsides, you can relax and eat a bit slower, savoring each bite. Don’t eat until you’re full – eat until the hunger is just gone. This is also uncomfortable at first, but it goes away over time.
4. Be okay with throwing away food. Eventually, you’ll learn to plate smaller portions, knowing it’s perfectly acceptable to go back for seconds. But right now, you’ll plate more because you’re used to eating until full, not until “no longer hungry.”
5. Instead of focusing on foods to give up, focus on foods to add! Make this a wonderful time of discovery for yourself. Teach yourself how to cook in new styles, and see if you like exotic fruits and vegetables you can buy at a farmer’s market.
6. Ignore guilt talk from well-meaning, yet harmful individuals. Everyone’s dieting – and those who aren’t are “weird.” They’ll try to talk you out of having cheesecake or drinking a full-calorie soda. They’ll think it’s odd when you take 2 bites of the cheesecake and smile as you put your fork down because you can have another cheesecake tomorrow if you want – there’s no NEED to finish it.”
I know that once you embrace a more relaxed, moderate state of mind when it comes to eating, you’ll notice your peace with food results in a healthier and more satisfied you.”
So that’s one example of a “sharing blog post,” where not only do you come across as an expert, with a personal touch, but you’ve also shown yourself to be a researcher, willing to showcase the debate without making your readers go all over the place to find this out on their own.
Right now you’re going to create the same kind of post for your blog (or to put on a free blog). Go back to page 3 to see the summary of steps if you need to.
Remember not to just hyperlink to resources. Extract quotes from them to share right on your blog. Don’t copy the entire page someone wrote – that’s content theft. But quoting and linking back is a form of sharing information.
Include quotes, summaries, images, videos, or whatever means you can to help support the issue.
This may seem tedious to you the first time you do it. But over time, you’ll begin sharing with this type of system in a way that feels comfortable for you – and your readers will see the value and thank you for your contributions and guidance.
